We’ve all experienced it – a holiday White Elephant exchange that starts off playful but quickly turns competitive. Someone steals the gift they brought. Couples team up to keep the “best” present. Someone ends up stuck with the singing fish no one wanted. And even though everyone laughs, someone is always a little annoyed about what happened three swaps ago.
Now imagine that same dynamic – but instead of joke gifts, it’s Dad’s classic car, Mom’s jewelry, or the family cabin. And this time, there are no rules, no turns, and definitely no laughing it off later.
The Game Nobody Wants to Play
Without a proper estate plan, this is exactly what can happen after someone passes away. The stakes are far higher, the emotions are real, and the damage can last for decades.
In White Elephant, at least there are rules: everyone agrees to play, there’s a system for taking turns, and there’s a limit on how many times something can be stolen. But when someone dies without a clear legal plan, there is:
- No guidance
- No referee
- No agreement
- And no structure to prevent conflict
Families are left to figure things out on their own, often while still grieving.
When “Stealing” Gets Real
Just like in the game, people fight over the same items. Someone feels cheated because they believed they were “supposed” to get something. Others form alliances, keep score, and compare who received “more.” And unlike the holiday party, these hurt feelings don’t fade – they often deepen.
Without a clear estate plan:
- State law decides who inherits
- Someone must go to court to be appointed in charge
- The process is slow, expensive, and draining
- Family members may rush to claim items
- Sentimental items become bargaining chips
- Stepchildren and spouses may end up in painful disputes
- Verbal promises carry no legal weight
The result? Broken relationships that could have been avoided.
Creating Clarity Instead of Conflict
At my firm, we help families prevent these situations long before they happen. Estate planning isn’t just about documents – it’s about giving your loved ones certainty, clarity, and peace.
We help you:
- Choose who should be in charge
- Make sure sentimental items go to the right people
- Put your exact wishes in writing
- Protect blended families from conflict
- Ensure your voice – not the court’s – guides every decision
During our Life & Legacy Planning Session, we walk through everything you own, whom you want to receive it, and how to do it in the smoothest, least stressful way possible. You make the decisions now, while you can explain the “why,” instead of leaving your family to guess later.
This Holiday Season, Give the Gift of Peace
While other families are plotting their White Elephant steals and teasing each other about who ended up with what, you can give your family something far more meaningful – the gift of a clear plan, calm hearts, and the guarantee that they’ll never have to fight over your estate.
This year, give your loved ones the peace of knowing that everything is taken care of.
At Cheever Law, APC, we don’t just draft documents; we ensure you make informed and empowered decisions about life and death for yourself and the people you love, starting with a valuable and educational Life & Legacy Planning Session. The Life & Legacy Planning Session will allow you to get more financially organized and make the best choices for the people you love. If you have already completed your estate plan, we will review that plan at your Life & Legacy Planning Session to ensure that it will work the way you intend and address any holes or gaps that may be present if circumstances have changed since you executed your plan.
To learn more about our one-of-a-kind systems and services, contact us or schedule a 15-minute introductory call today.